'Twas The Night Before Christmas...

...Yes, I know thats not really a very original title post, but I'm keeping with the whole Christmas theme here, because I've felt like a bit of a Grinch recently! So I'm making up for it now. I dug into my Christmas Cheer supply and went all out this morning by making red, white and green paper chains for the living room. See, I'm not a complete party pooper!
I'm finding it hard to believe that it's actually Christmas Eve today/night. It's sort of all just crept up on me, without my notice. I can't imagine that tomorrow morning I'm going to be sitting under the Christmas tree handing out and unwrapping presents. And then it will be all over, for another year. I had no hype this year. Nothing of the sort. And I am really sad about that, because I used to love this time of year when I was young. I guess that's what you get when you grow up!
(I'm still going to wait up and catch Santa out this year...)

So, in the spirit of Christmas and all that is Merry, I am going to to a list, not of the things I want, but of the thigns I am grateful I have.

Christmas Love List

My family.
I know, I know, very generic. But it's true; I love my family so much more than they realize. My Mum, my Dad, my older brother and my younger brother. Through everything, good times and bad, these four beautiful people have been there for me. By my side, no matter what time of day it is, no matter how bad a mood I'm in, they're there holding my hand, and will never let go. At times, they definitely feel underappreciated, especially my Mum. I wish I could tell her how much she means to me, as well as my Dad and brothers. They are amazing people, and I feel like the luckiest girl in the world to have a family like mine.

My friends.
Life just wouldn't be the same without the friends I've been lucky enough to gain. A few particular people have changed my life and impacted me on such a deep level, that I would simply not be the same if they weren't part of my life.

Giving Love and Recieving Love.
No matter where love comes from and who it's for, love is everywhere. Love is the foundation of everything. Love brings meaning to life. Love makes you feel warm, safe, happy. Love holds the pieces of my heart together.

Dreams, Goals and Aspirations.
We can all achieve our goals, we can all live our dreams, we can all reach our aspirations. These three things are reasons to continue onward and upward. Because we are all capable. Our dreams, goals and aspirations make us who we are.
Smiling.
It is amazing just how good a smile can make you feel.
Tea and Coffee!
There is nothing better than sitting down to a nice, steaming hot cup of your favourite beverage.
PIRATES!
Okay, namely Johnny Depp... He's just really handsome, okay!? I've had pirate songs stuck in my head all week, and I honestly think that's contributed to my happiness of late. And honestly, pirate shanties are so cool. And so are the clothes. ;) Yo, ho, and a bottle of rum!
Early Mornings and Sunrises.
I am a morning person. I wake up early, every morning, so I can appreciate the coming of a new day. Without fail, I go out the back and look up at the sky, which sometimes still has stars winking down at me. The golden glow of the rising sun warms my face and fills me with my own glow; the glow of feeling alive. Morning times are the most important part of my day: my time alone, where I can gather my thoughts and make sense of my life.

There are many, many more things I could write about. When I really think about it, I have so much more than what ED says I have. I can be so much more without ED, than with ED. I can be Eleanor, the happy, smart, life-loving Eleanor who felt comfortable in her skin, who looked forward to doing new, exciting things and never held back. I know I can be that person again; I appreciate that it will take time for the stranglehold of ED to weaken, and the ties ED has on me to loosen, but I'm prepared to wait. The wait, the effort, the hardships and the constant struggles will be worth it, in the end.

The last thing to go on my Christmas Love List, is you. Yes, you. You beautiful, amazing, intelligent, capable, strong, independant, motivational, inspirational human being. I love you. There are no amount of words I can use to express my gratitude towards the love and support you have all given me. Without this blog, and without the kindness I've been shown, I would not be where I am now. This blogging community has turned my life around and I've come out of the shell ED built up around me. You've all enabled me to show a side of me that ED has tried to hide. Eleanor.
You are the last, but certainly not the least, important thing to go on my Love List. Because I do love you. You all deserve love. And you all deserve happiness. You all deserve to be you, without anything holding you back.

Have a very Merry Christmas, because you deserve it. Don't let anything stop you from having happiness.

Love, love, love.